2.3 ~ #2 (please watch film before reading review, may contain spoilers)

2001: A Space Odyssey (1968)

From Netflix: "Stanley Kubrick's quiet masterpiece probes the mysteries of space and human destiny. While investigating the appearance of mysterious monoliths throughout the universe, astronauts David (Keir Dullea) and Frank (Gary Lockwood) battle their ship's intelligent computer, HAL-9000. This epic sci-fi drama based on Arthur C. Clarke's story "The Sentinel" was nominated for four Academy Awards and won for its stunning special effects."

Ok, first thing I have to say is that I have had SUCH a hard time trying to motivate myself to watch this film. It weren't for the fact that I am dedicated to this project and doing it properly, I would SO skip this one. ugh. It seems like such a BOY movie LOL.

First impression: So THAT'S where that classic sci-fi music comes from! LOL

Second impression: Holy Ghost! It's 2 and a half hours long?!

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(BTW, I had a moment of clarity in the shower earlier. Everyone says 'oh god!' or 'jesus christ!' when they want to exclaim, but the holy ghost gets no play. let's hear it one time for the holy spirit, y'all!)

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-7 minutes in: is this all going to be animals attacking each other? :yawn:

-8 minutes in: people in gorilla suits = FAIL. I could play a better gorilla and I have no formal gorilla training.

-12 minutes in: PLEASE can I just shut this off and PRETEND I watched it?!

-13 minutes in: There's that MUSIC again!

-15 minutes in: Holy Ghost, help me. This fucking blows.

-16 minutes in: Dude, this movie IS all about animals attacking each other...

-19 minutes in: A person!

-23 minutes in: WOW! SOMEONE SPOKE! A SOUND OTHER THAN INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC AND ANIMAL GRUNTS WAS JUST HEARD!


ok, you get my drift. I am not AT ALL interested in this type of stuff. Stanley Kubrick is a genius and all that, but...no. This is just not my bag. Great use of music to convey emotion, though.

-Cool furniture, too.

(idk if you've caught on, but I'm writing as I watch...I shall continue for the next 2 hours because, well, that's how long is left in the movie and I'm trying to maintain my sanity here.)

-They use A LOT of music in this film. Like, in place of dialogue. Interesting...

-LOL. the photos they're looking through say "DAYUM" at the bottom. Late 60s ebonics?

-In the coming weeks, I'm going to have to watch ANOTHER Kubrick classic, "A Clockwork Orange". It's supposed to be disturbing as hell. Have I mentioned I am VERY not looking forward to that one?

-GREAT camera angles. Truly. and I know I've already said it, but this film makes GREAT use of music to set moods.

-Crap. Turns out there's a THIRD Kubrick movie on the list, Dr. Strangelove. Can I handle THREE of this man's films? I've only ever seen The Shining, and I thought was great, but I've heard A LOT about how disturbed this guy was.

-HOLY GHOST! A FOURTH?! Full Metal Jacket is also a Kubrick film. sonofabitch.

ok, ok. back to the movie (I paused it this whole time to my research...WHAT?!)

-Oh, wow. I'm sorry. 51 minutes in: "smile for the camera with the weird black wall chunk" LMAO that hand motion ("get in a little closer") KILLED me!

-These grunting, guttural sounds that are serving as music right now are driving me batshit. Oh wait, now there's a remarkably high pitched 30 second whistle. Lovely.

-an hour and half left EXACTLY. shoot me.

-54 minutes in: GREAT fucking shots. This whole minute is GORGEOUS.

-that HAL9000 computer sounds terrifying. Both it's voice, and the very idea of it. that's the last I'll speak about that, because I don't know if it has anything to do with the rest of the plot, but I imagine it must.

-68 minutes in: ANOTHER remarkable shot. The cinematography is amazing, even if the story is really not holding my attention...

-77 minutes in: ok, this is starting to get creepy.

-79 minutes in: SUPERcreepy.

-87 minutes in: INSANE!

-92 minutes in: it looks like these effects are being done with Legos. The movie is over 40 years old, so...forgiven.

MORAL OF THE STORY: TECHNOLOGY WILL KILL US ALL. (at least, that's what I gather with 45 minutes left in the film.)

-97 minutes in: WOW.

104 minutes in: this movie TOTALLY reminds me of that "Portal" video game...there is no cake! The cake is a lie! LOL

111 minutes in: wow. it's all starting to make sense.

112 minutes in: that fucking groaning again. I wish it would stop.

116 minutes in: SO confused. I feel like I'm looking at an old school screensaver.

122 minutes in: WTF?!?!?!?!?!?!? When will it end?!

126 minutes in: that....was a 15 minute screensaver. why, oh why? That was excruciating. oh and now I'm REALLY fucking confused.

127 minutes in: terrified.

ok, MORAL OF THE STORY: Stanley Kubrick was a NUT. He was a complete fucking creep. The end.

When the credits began, I said out loud, "YOU'RE FUCKING KIDDING!!! REALLY?!" Mind you, not "really?" like "wow, seriously?" but "really?" like "you've got to be SHITTING me that I waited all this time for THAT!"

I guess I should say something about how humankind relies on technology too much, and it's going to lead to the end of our humanity, etc. etc. But I'm too fucking annoyed at the thought that I spent 2 and a half hours of my life on this to give a crap right now.

In short, besides the cinematography, I don't understand why ANYONE would want to watch this film, let alone why people think it's so phenomenal. Then again, the only people I got reviews from (all of which were good) were men, and men like some weird things, don't they? Hmm...let's chalk this up to "well, at least I can say I've seen it."

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And with this, the second week of the project is complete, the first week of movie watching and reviewing is in the books, so to speak, and we can look forward to next week, when I'll be watching these movies, among others:

#3: "Akira"
#4: "Aliens"
DOTW: "Live Nude Girls Unite"

BTW, I would love if people watched the movies along with me, even if it's just the ones you haven't already seen, not just so I can speak candidly without worrying about spoilers, but so we can discuss! :)

Thanks! "See" you next week!

-D

2.2 ~ #1

"12 Angry Men "(1957)

From Netflix: "A guilty verdict means death -- but the jury's not about to let that spoil their day. Twelve men must decide the fate of an 18-year-old boy accused of fatally stabbing his father. Only one (Henry Fonda) wants to take the time to coolly deliberate the case. Sidney Lumet (Network) made his directorial debut in this fiery drama that illuminates all the petty impediments on the path to justice."



I actually saw this movie in high school English, so anywhere from 6-10 years ago, I'm not sure what year I saw it...I thought it was a great movie then, though it couldn't have left much of an impression considering I had forgetten I'd seen it till I popped in the DVD and saw the opening scene.

It's in black and white, which I love, though I have very little experience with films this old. Movies back in the day were so much more dramatic, and I think much better acted, considering that because the effects and flash were lacking, a movie could only be carried by great acting. People don't appreciate good acting anymore...

It's incredible how jaded people can be that because they're so wrapped up in their own situations, they don't realize that throughout the movie, they are talking about a person's life, how something as BIG as whether a person lives or dies is in their hands, and based on their prejudgments, they are willing to let a person die without a second thought. The message of this film rings just as true now as it did in the fifties...people need to stop and think before they make decisions...just because something seems easy or simple doesn't mean it is. Choices require thought, especially considering that whether you realize it or not, your choices affect everyone around you.

It's not just about choices, either. Every day people hear about celebrities, friends, people in general...and based on a few things we pick up about them, we imagine an entire persona on people that we may not know very well, if at all. People we have never even met, we imagine we know better than we know ourselves based on a few tokens of information. And what is human nature to do when we think we know someone? We judge them. We can't help it, our ancestors did it for survival. "There's that guy again. I see him everyday and he hasn't attacked me yet. He must be ok." Nowadays, we can't help it anymore than they did, we even (and especially) do it to people that mean us no harm. How often to we read gossip rags or watch E! news and take something a celebrity has done or said personally? We've all done it...but why? We don't know these people, we don't know why they do or don't do the things they do or don't...but that doesn't stop us from judging them. Maybe the most important message of this film is that we should GENUINELY try to live and let live, make an effort to not stake entire ideas of people on an activity or photo or whathaveyou. Focus on yourself and don't run around thinking you have any right to form ideas about people you don't really know.

In short, great film. Really makes you think. Made me think, anyway. If you're the type that must have loud noises and explosions to keep entertained, this isn't for you. But if you're down for a great story, try this one on for size.

2.1 ~ Documentary of the Week

"American Swing" (2008)

From Netflix: "Mathew Kaufman and Jon Hart direct this documentary that chronicles the rise, heyday and decline of New York City's Plato's Retreat, the legendary sex club that catered to adventurous heterosexual couples in the 1970s and beyond. Featuring frank interviews with former members and graphic footage of the club's activities, the film explores how a once-thriving center of free love imploded amid drugs, tangled relationships and the rise of AIDS."

First off, I've gotta say that as a very sexual person, I can totally see the appeal of swing clubs and swinging in general, but as a wife that has always been a little more jealous than the average person, I'm fairly certain that I would castrate my husband if he ever even brought this up as a topic of conversation.

So, that being said...

If I was single, this would totally be my scene LOL

This film is pretty interesting because while it might seem that introducing outside sexual partners might be a bad idea to the average marriage, and maybe in a lot of cases it was, the couples interviewed here are couples that have been married for decades and only feel that their partnership was enhanced because of the swinging. This I can also understand, because I have done a fair share of studying into relationship therapy and the 2 biggest topics of arguments among couples are money and sex, not in that order.

So, doesn't it make sense then that as long as both parties are sexually satisfied, even if it's not with each other, and trust is maintained in the relationship, that that might be the most healthy relationship in existence? Well, of course. But then there's the whole jealousy thing, like I mentioned before. I am not the type to differentiate love and sex. Or rather, I am, but I can't be sure that my partner is that type as well, and that would be my main problem with the idea of swinging.

If people had better communication, and they could just drop their inhibitions with each other and ask for what they want in bed, rather than giving up on satisfying each other and deciding to get satisfaction from other people, maybe swinging wouldn't be something that people felt they'd need to do. I imagine if it's just a fun thing for both parties, why not partake in any case? But I assume that it's like the experiences I've heard about from friends that have had threesomes with a partner that had been monogamous with them...someone ends up hurt because they weren't really as ready for it as they thought they were. The chances of both parties in a couple being as open REALLY to the idea of swinging as they think they are, especially AFTER the first experience, is probably slim.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that if you ARE in a partnership that could use some extra excitement in your love lives, and you can be absolutely certain that both you and your partner can leave the emotions at the door and just have a good time...then by all means! Perhaps in another time or with a partner that I didn't care as much about (LOL) I could totally be there with you. But I can say for damn near absolute sure that this isn't the lifestyle for me :)

Cool film, lots of old footage, though a little NSFW, both for the footage and the dialogue...if you're not into raunchiness, this is one you oughta stay away from. Fun movie otherwise! Lots of interesting people giving interesting interviews, cool look into where swinging came from and how it gained momentum...great 70s soundtrack too!

BTW, if you are in any way grossed out or otherwise creeped out by OLD people talking VERY openly about sexual acts, IN DETAIL...maybe you should skip this one ;)